Relationships Revealed: Sarah Swafford

During the session on relationships, Sarah outlined the ways that growing in virtue builds Christ-centered relationships.

Before diving into ways to build virtue, Sarah outlined what she calls the “emoticoaster.” It describes the pattern that a lot of people follow when they are getting into a relationship. She explains the journey from mental stalking to social media stalking to texting, flirting, and calling. Most people in the room raised their hands to say that they had seen someone riding the emoticoaster before. Sarah then walked through the many traps associated with the emoticoaster.

Fortunately, there is a better way. When men and women are in virtuous relationships, they reveal the love of the Trinity through their unity. Sarah explains that this requires sacrifice. In order to be people who are willing to sacrifice, they must be people of virtue. Sarah explains that this virtue is what men and women most desire in the other. Virtue is striving for human excellence and knowing and choosing the good. It gives freedom to love. The rest of her talk explains what this virtuous man or woman looks like.

Sarah explains that when a woman seeks a man, she is looking for someone who is masculine, confident, and committed. Men are seeking a woman who is feminine, confident, and committed. All of those characteristics are formed through growth in virtue. To do this, Sarah makes it super simple: “If you want something to grow in your life, feed it. If you want something to die, starve it.” In order to grow in virtue, choose specific ways to grow, and then have an accountability partner who holds you to it.

Ultimately, this session on relationships is a reminder that we are made for unity and called to be Christ-like. In order live up to that, we have to strive to become men and women of virtue.